so soon about X-Mas?

Well, it's been on my mind.

Ivy leaves for 3 weeks with her grandparents come the 16th of Dec.

I don't really have family, other than Dean.

I plan on working the day it's self, with not having to open presents and such with Ivy it seems like a good way not to stew over it.

Dean wants a whole turkey dinner, so he can eat himself stupid.

So i will be stuffing and prepping a bird the night before and putting it in the oven on low for the 8 hours I'm gone or have dean put it on and baste it while I'm gone.

but it's a lot of work and last year I was in tears by the afternoon.

I was just missin so may people and my sister showed up and then bailed a short while later before we had dinner. I didn't have a gift wrapped for me under the tree, from Ivy or Dean

It was not a good christmas, all crowed into that small apartment.

But this year, I don't know.

Is it sad to think that I prolly wont have presents under the tree again this year?

Other than the ones we get for Ivy, one from mom, one from Santa and one from Dad as well as her sock. 

At home with my mum and dad we did christmas PJ's on christmas eve. 

in the morning I would tear through all my presents from santa, mum would make me pancakes. we would stuff the bird and make home made icecream. I would cram as much of the goodies in my sock in me before dinner. My sisters and brothers would show up with their familes that afternoon and we would have a huge christmas dinner with games after dinner.

Last year I got Dean Flames tickets for NYE game. I think I went to bed early.

But, christmas isn't about what you get, it's about what you give. i just felt I put a lot out there and didn't feel like I was given anything back by Christmas.

I'm just not feeling the spirit.

 nor do I want to start my christmas baking, I don't have a freezer to store it in.

 I may do some things a little different this time around.