Life is serious business.

Today I went out after work and walked the mall, finding lovely things and wishing against hope that I had money to buy something.

I walked into a store and found about 6 things to try on.

I got in the dressing room and tried them all on. New skirts, a funky button up with classic slacks and this awesome shawl vest. Then I hung everything back up after looking at the price tags and went home.

It wasn't sticker shock, they were pretty inexpensive, and it wasn't that they didn't fit, they were all a pretty nice.

I just don't have any money to spend on anything right now.

So I spent another half hour or so looking at lovely things for Ivy, I also can't afford, not for a while. 

At the end, I blew my budget on a snack pack at kernals and went and picked up Ivy.

I am in a rut right now. 

I'm not seeing my friends or going out simply because I really can't afford to do much.

I'm paying my bills and providing for my family and living on a very modest budget.

I'm ok with it, but.......

I can't afford to get my hair done right now and it's getting super long to the point that all I can do is put it up.

I need to add a few pieces to my work wardrobe, it's getting  a bit shabby at the cuffs.

And I need to invest in  new pair of work heels, mine which I bought 8 years ago have finally given up the fight. bye bye mary janes....they had the perfect squared toes.

My wool coat no longer fits my chest, plus the lining is shot.

But I know it's all in the budgeting and that I will eventually get what I want, it just takes a few months and not the weeks I'm used to from days gone by. I get to splurge once every few months on one thing.

My nails are ragged, my hairs too long, my shoes have seen better days, my wardrobe is non existent, and my social life is pretty spartan. 

But I'm pretty happy, my life is pretty stable and drama free.

I have a roof over my head which I own, same with my car.

My daughter is in a safe and loving home.

I am loved and content, just wishing for a better.